A Badgered Groom

Today is my 4th wedding anniversary.

When we woke up this morning, after the sweet stuff (Happy Anniversary, I love you, etc.), I said to Erik, “I’m so glad I badgered you into proposing.”

Five years and three months ago, Erik and I met online (eharmony) and started dating. Three months later, we moved in together. And three months after that, Erik proposed.

This may sound like a whirlwind fairy tale, but here’s what really happened.

  1. Erik and I met on eHarmony and hit it off from the first date. We started spending a lot of time together very quickly and almost immediately hit our first relationship road block. I wanted to spend more time together, Erik thought we were spending enough time together. Upon further discussion, I realized that Erik had a specific idea about the pace of relationships. (Read: slow, abominably slow.) And I was of the opinion that as long as you’re enjoying each other, who cares at what pace you move? My logic won out and we started spending more and more time together.
  2. Around three months into our relationship, I rather suddenly lost my job. Shortly after I met Erik, I had moved into a rather expensive apartment right near my office building and upon losing my job could no longer afford it. We were essentially wasting apartment space anyway, because one of us slept at the other persons apartment almost every night. So, when I lost my job, we moved in together.
  3. We had managed to successfully combine our physical stuff and things were going well. We were both in school and as such were spending a lot of time hanging around the house together. We negotiated time alone and space to ourselves rather well (if I do say so myself) and after an unknown, but brief amount of time, I started thinking I wanted to marry him. And if I wanted to marry him, why wait? This is where things got complicated. (re: #1, Erik’s ideas about the pace of relationships.) What was the rush? We had only been together for a few months. But I didn’t see any reason to put it off. I wanted to start our life together as soon as possible. After probably two or so months of badgering him, Erik took me camping and proposed. (When we told his family, I very quickly discovered where he had learned his ideas about the pace of relationships.)
  4. We set the date of the wedding for a year and a half later, which gave us plenty of time to satisfy anyone’s notion that we hadn’t been together long enough and that people should be engaged for a year before marriage. But then Erik enlisted in the Air National Guard. And we were told he could be sent to basic at any time, wedding be damned. Our July wedding became a rather rushed January wedding. We got married in front of about 50 people and lived happily ever after.

Darling, I am so glad I badgered you into marrying me.

Happy Anniversary!


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